I had my back turned to the conversation between my mother and her friend. It was better that way, because I had tears in my eyes.
The friend kept asking forbidden questions, each one stabbed into my core, like shards of glass through my heart.
I couldn’t believe the inconsideration of this person as she kept digging deeper into our personal matters. She was trying to get all the information, all of our dirt from past years.
Was it wrong for me to think of her as rude? as a complete gossip? Did I not have experience to back up my belief?
I did. I knew what she would do with this new knowledge. It would spread like wild fire lighting our family’s reputation a blaze.
Her interrogation brought me back to a time I never wanted to return to, a time that I wanted to leave forever in our past. But I was forced to go back.
It hurt. So very much. And when the conversation ended abruptly with a rebuke from this woman’s husband I was relieved to say the least.
But, the wound didn’t go away. Not even when the couple left our home. Late that night I struggled in my sleep as her questions became a visual torment in my dreams.
I awoke the next morning weary from a wretched night and a burdened mind. The weight I now carried was nearly unbearable.
It was in the car when I finally shared my troubles with my mother.
“I can’t believe what she said. How could she be so uncaring? Has she no idea what her words might have caused? It hurt me so very much, I can’t even imagine what you must have felt.”
She choose to remain silent to what I said. I don’t know why.
It has been several days since the passing of that event and yet still it is causing me frustration.
Sometimes it takes a while for wounds to heal. And even if they do stop bleeding, a scar might be left in its place to remind you every now and again of the pain you once felt.
Emotional wounds are hard to heal, but I believe the healing begins with a willingness to forgive and forget. Christ lead us in this example when he sacrificed Himself as the spotless lamb. Through Him came the forgiveness of our own sin and through Him we can forgive those who sin against us.
Through forgiveness we find love, and as we all know….
Love covers over a multitude of sin!!
In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith
Dear Lord, I want to take this time, this moment, to forgive the wounds which this woman has caused. Please make her conscience of the fact that her words have the ability to cause either pain or healing. Help her to make the choice to use her words to build others up instead of tear them down. Please help me, in my own pursuit, to purify my words and to control my tongue. Let every word that I ever say be used to bring you glory. In the name of the lamb that was slain for my own sins I forgive and choose to bring you praise for this situation. I love you ever so much. Amen.