WAIT: Wait For The LORD.

I shared with you a couple months ago in my post Wrestling With God that I have felt a distance between me and Jesus. At the time I did not know what it was, but I now do and I thought I should just give you an update.

Ever since I can remember, even from before I had known what it meant to be saved and before the Holy Spirit made me His temple, I have felt the presence of God in powerful ways. His Spirit has literally come and rested upon me and I could feel it in a way that I can’t explain. But it was always something that I felt. I got used to this feeling representing God, when it was there it meant He was there. When it wasn’t, which it nearly never was, I felt as if He had left for some reason… Usually I explained it with unconfessed sins.

A couple of years ago He began, in small ways, to take the feeling away and I would spend hours in personal confession trying to figure out what I had done to deserve His absence. Sometimes I wouldn’t be able to reconnect myself with the feeling and after doing all I could do to try and feel or hear God with no success I would go into times of deep despair. Sometimes I would cry late into the night. But this happened in such a small degree it did not completely alarm me.

But then, all of the sudden God was nowhere to be found.

I could not not feel Him and I could not hear Him for weeks.

I went to a worship service and asked someone to pray for me. I told them exactly what had happened and the man told me, “Maybe you are so used to commuting to God in this one way that it has become unhealthy and He is trying to teach you a different way to know Him.”

Thank you, Father for putting this wisdom in the mouth of my brother. I know it was from You!

I began to meditate on what this man had said and I knew that this was indeed what God was doing. It took me a while to fully digest what it meant and how it would apply to my life, but at least I wasn’t fumbling in the dark anymore.

God is working in me. He is pulling at my heart and molding it to His design.

I was too used to the “spiritual highs” of the Spirit, that I had lost the truth of what it meant to truly trust in The Lord. I had forgotten the truth that not everyone experiences the move of God through feelings, but many must know Him by what He has written in His Word.

It has been a hard road, indeed. I have been through many a deep soul struggle through the midst of this. Many a confusing battle within my head and heart. Many a doubting of my faith.

But GOD IS GOOD!! He is teaching me, and I am thankful for His lesson.

He has given me a word to think upon and to make my own. It sums up the work that He is doing. If my life was a book this chapter would be called this…

WAIT: Wait on The Lord.

It is a treasure that I found in the Psalms and Prophets. It is often repeated and most likely a favorite phrase of its Author.

“Wait for the LORD; be strong, and let your heart take courage. Wait for the LORD” – Psalm 27:14

“I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope.” – Psalm 130:5

“But as for me, I watch in hope for the LORD, I wait for God my Savior; my God will hear me.” – Micah 7:7

“I will wait for the LORD, who is hiding his face from the descendants of Jacob. I will put my trust in him.” – Isaiah 8:17

“It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.” – Lamentations 3:26

“Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him.” – Psalm 37:7

As I have been meditating on this, I have learned to not rely any longer on the feelings or hearings I have been so accustomed to. I no longer worry about my relationship with God for IT IS FIRM. I know my God and He IS GOOD!

I’m trusting Him, and obeying Him, and leaning into Him. And what a comfort it is to me. I have the spirit of peace and joy I have lacked for a long while and my soul is bursting to PRAISE HIS HOLY NAME!!


Dear Abba! Thank you for this new lesson You are teaching me. How caught up we Christians get. We think we know You, but then You begin to teach us something new – a new facet of Your magnitude – and we freak out at the unknown. But really, it is such a big blessing. I praise You for what You are showing me and the work You are doing in my heart! YOU ARE GOOD! And I love You so very much.

Well, Lord. You have told me to wait. That is what I will do. I will wait and listen. I am ready for You to talk. I will wait as long as it takes. Until then, trust and obey.

Trust and Obey. For there is no other way. To be happy in Jesus. But to Trust and Obey.

Your faithful loving daughter…


In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith


Pick Up Your Weapon

They say faith is a battle. Every day. Every hour. So why do I feel like I have no armor? I’m a solider called to war, and I think I’ve dropped my sword. Maybe, It’s not just me, though, because I feel like I’m surrounded by soldiers with makeshift weapons and cardboard shields. And I’m thinking… What kind of army is this?

In the beginning it was a little different. In the beginning there were men who were valiant, and they were skilled with their fighting talents.

Isn’t it funny? Because in the beginning, these courageous men, remember them, they were the least of these, robbers and thieves, liars and cheats.

Isn’t it funny? Because now this army isn’t made mostly of these, but rather we have “better” men with even better skills. But you’ve got to ask, “Really?” Because these so called better men have got more feeble hearts and even frailer fighting skills. There’s no bravery and valiance is absent. Oh sure, that doesn’t seem like it. But think about it…


Now you get the battle. It’s this little thing called LIFE. Life with a capital L for lie! Because we live in a fabrication. Most of us anyway. We live this fictional facade of faith. We call ourselves believers, when really we’re deceivers because we say we live like Christ. But when did Christ ever compromise?

It’s all a big fat lie.

And that’s why I feel like a weaponless fighter. Because I’m in a section of the army whose under fire, and we don’t even know it. It’s like we all have leprosy, because we can’t even feel a single thing!!

Jesus healed the lepers. The ones all others left for dead. Well maybe there are other Christians wanting to leave US for dead, because we’re useless in the war if we don’t get up and fight. So maybe we should cry out, and pray out, and sing out, and ask this Jesus to heal our spiritual leprosy.

We need to get up and fight.

Well, here’s the thing. I’ve been thinking, because when Jesus healed ten lepers of their leprosy only one came back and gave Him thanks. That’s only 10%.

Are we American Christians in that simply 10? Or have we joined the 90 and forgotten to give thanks to our King of Glory!? Have we become apathetic to the life that He has given!? Have we forgotten the power of the Spirit!? The glory of the call! I’ve been thinking… Maybe we have.

Christian means Christ In or In Christ and Christ is a victor so why aren’t we victorious? He has power. His Spirit is full of power. Then, if we have His spirit that means we are full of power. So now the question becomes… Where is it?

Think about it…


I used the word a minute ago. It’s this little thing called compromise. It’s when we give up the power of our Living Christ for wordily lies. And my question is… Why?

It’s not something we have to do… It’s something that we choose to do, and something He allows us to.

Sure, I get it. It’s hard to surrender. To live a separate life. To live in sanctification. Because literally sanctified means set apart, but we… we only want to be a part of what we shouldn’t be.

It’s the number one compromise, the number one lie, this thing called sin. And we constantly get sucked in. Because it seems easier than living a holy life. Well, we’re called to live that holy life, so put down your compromise.

Put down your compromise and pick up your cross. Because the cross is the ultimate weapon, and we can’t be victorious without it. Pick up the WORDand read it. Because that is our protection. Put on your belt of truthfulness, arm your breast with the plate of righteousness, place your feet in the reediness of peace that comes from the gospel message, take up your shield of faith, and place on your head the helmet of salvation, and lastly fight with the Spirit because He is your perfect unyielding weapon.

Seriously, think about it…




In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith