A spoken word poem I wrote many months ago. I found it while going through some old documents. Enjoy!
A One in a Million Man
I sit and observe, watch the man with the strawberry blond and his beard spread wide across his face, his smile shining through. He laughs and it is strong and full of life. He talks and it is humble, yet sure. He works and it is efficient and worthy. He does not complain, but accepts everything with grace.
Sixteen years is the gap between us, but I still watch him and observe. I watch to learn from him.
Perhaps some think this watching is absurd. Old fashioned, some might say. But it is the second biggest soul decision you will make. And I don’t believe in redos for this one. Don’t believe in scratch over the old and bring in the new. Don’t believe in adultery. Don’t believe in divorce. This is a soul decision. A bind yourself to another forever death the only separator.
No. I won’t play the dating game. Love is not a toy you play with, toss in the air and watch as hearts fall split at your whims. Souls are too precious, too one of a kind to be flippant with.
No. This is a once in a lifetime decision and I want to make it perfect. So I watch and observe and try to find the best qualifiers: potentials who, like me, are also searching and seeking a spouse for this wondrous life call of marriage.
But the pickings are few, for the idea of marriage has been skewed by the present age.
Media tells us marriage is for everyone and anyone. Like a Hollywood film with Prince Charming and his fair maiden. That it is all about how you feel. So date as many people as you want. When you finally find “the one”, get married. And if the heart poundings you once had for your spouse fade, then that’s okay – just get a new one.
Yeah, it has been badly defined.
Marriage is not for the hopeless romantics who spend all their time sailing dreamboats in the sky, with their heads whisking the clouds.
Marriage is holy ground.
It is a life call. A mission field. Soul labor, where every moment is in service to another, and selfishness is nonexistent or the ultimate enemy that will make you poisoned and venomous.
I’ve watched too many marriages die defeated by spouses that don’t live selfless to pretend otherwise.
Marriage is not a dreamboat it’s a death-machine. A daily living death to self, and that’s why it’s a battle.
If it’s so hard, then why bother?
Because if you are victorious it is the most beautiful masterpiece you can accomplish on earth.
Marriage is service, service to your spouse and service to your King. It is a gift that two souls bound together can offer to the master of them both. It is a lifelong giving; a soul, heart, mind, and strength gift, every day for the rest of your life.
And this is why I am so cautious. This is why I spend so much time watching and observing and adding to a mental mindset of what it is I’m looking for . . .
A man, not a boy. A man who knows how to act properly. Who knows love is not about the first kiss, the honeymoon romance, or the precious moments leading up to that. Who knows love is deeper and dirtier and it takes mind muscle more than heart feeling. That love is saying “I’m sorry” on the bad times, and apologizing after getting angry and laughing away the heartache of the difficult days. That love is gracious and forgiving to the wife when she screws up and makes mistakes. That love is leading and preaching and pointing to a King. That love is always praying and worshiping through every day. That love is always knowing that being humble is better than having muscle and appearing strong. That love is sticking through and digging through the soul messes when two disagreeing opinions collide and years seem to be lost on an ongoing fight that’s most likely pointless.
Love is the tough stuff, the glue that holds the souls together and makes the two hearts one.
I want a man who knows what love is and knows how to put it into action. Not only with me, but with everyone.
Love is Christ and all that He stands for. I want a husband who imitates that, who walks in a manner worthy of the gospel, worthy of the calling, worthy of carrying a cross. A man who pleases God, and who can help me do the same.
Such a man is one in a million. Solomon said that in Ecclesiastes, said that such a man is hard to find. Such a man is even more difficult to get . . . to earn.
So that is why I search and seek and try my best to be worth it.
The man with the strawberry blond, he is such a man. One day, perhaps, he will make a woman happy. But I have more waiting to do. And more searching. Then, maybe one day, I’ll find the hidden treasure of a one in a million man … But, it’s gonna take some time.
In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith