If I Say Thou Art Mine

If I say Thou art mine

Let my life prove it true

By the words that I say

By the things that I do

 

If I say Thou art mine

Let my heart agree

Trusting your words

And just decrees

 

If I say Thou art mine

Let me live by faith

Believing in You

Seeking Your face

 

If I say Thou art mine

Let me count the cost

Following You

Till worldly desire is lost

 

If I say Thou art mine

Let me not be afraid

To go where You lead

On the path You have made

 

If I say Thou art mine

Let me ever be true

To giving my all

Living for You

 

 

In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith

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One in a Million

A spoken word poem I wrote many months ago. I found it while going through some old documents. Enjoy!

A One in a Million Man

I sit and observe, watch the man with the strawberry ­blond and his beard spread wide across his face, his smile shining through. He laughs and it is strong and full of life. He talks and it is humble, yet sure. He works and it is efficient and worthy. He does not complain, but accepts everything with grace.

Sixteen years is the gap between us, but I still watch him and observe. I watch to learn from him.

Perhaps some think this watching is absurd. Old fashioned, some might say. But it is the second biggest soul decision you will make. And I don’t believe in redos for this one. Don’t believe in scratch over the old and bring in the new. Don’t believe in adultery. Don’t believe in divorce. This is a soul decision. A bind yourself to another forever ­ death the only separator.

No. I won’t play the dating game. Love is not a toy you play with, toss in the air and watch as hearts fall split at your whims. Souls are too precious, too one of a kind to be flippant with.

No. This is a once in a lifetime decision and I want to make it perfect. So I watch and observe and try to find the best qualifiers: potentials who, like me, are also searching and seeking a spouse for this wondrous life call of marriage.

But the pickings are few, for the idea of marriage has been skewed by the present age.

Media tells us marriage is for everyone and anyone. Like a Hollywood film with Prince Charming and his fair maiden. That it is all about how you feel. So date as many people as you want. When you finally find “the one”, get married. And if the heart poundings you once had for your spouse fade, then that’s okay – just get a new one.

Yeah, it has been badly defined.

Marriage is not for the hopeless romantics who spend all their time sailing dreamboats in the sky, with their heads whisking the clouds.

Marriage is holy ground.

It is a life call. A mission field. Soul labor, where every moment is in service to another, and selfishness is nonexistent or the ultimate enemy that will make you poisoned and venomous.

I’ve watched too many marriages die defeated by spouses that don’t live selfless to pretend otherwise.

Marriage is not a dreamboat it’s a death-machine. A daily living death to self, and that’s why it’s a battle.

If it’s so hard, then why bother?

Because if you are victorious it is the most beautiful masterpiece you can accomplish on earth.

Marriage is service, service to your spouse and service to your King. It is a gift that two souls bound together can offer to the master of them both. It is a lifelong giving; a soul, heart, mind, and strength gift, every day for the rest of your life.

And this is why I am so cautious. This is why I spend so much time watching and observing and adding to a mental mindset of what it is I’m looking for . . .

A man, not a boy. A man who knows how to act properly. Who knows love is not about the first kiss, the honeymoon romance, or the precious moments leading up to that. Who knows love is deeper and dirtier and it takes mind muscle more than heart feeling. That love is saying “I’m sorry” on the bad times, and apologizing after getting angry and laughing away the heartache of the difficult days. That love is gracious and forgiving to the wife when she screws up and makes mistakes. That love is leading and preaching and pointing to a King. That love is always praying and worshiping through every day. That love is always knowing that being humble is better than having muscle and appearing strong. That love is sticking through and digging through the soul messes when two disagreeing opinions collide and years seem to be lost on an ongoing fight that’s most likely pointless.

Love is the tough stuff, the glue that holds the souls together and makes the two hearts one.

I want a man who knows what love is and knows how to put it into action. Not only with me, but with everyone.

Love is Christ and all that He stands for. I want a husband who imitates that, who walks in a manner worthy of the gospel, worthy of the calling, worthy of carrying a cross. A man who pleases God, and who can help me do the same.

Such a man is one in a million. Solomon said that in Ecclesiastes, said that such a man is hard to find. Such a man is even more difficult to get . . . to earn.

So that is why I search and seek and try my best to be worth it.

The man with the strawberry blond, he is such a man. One day, perhaps, he will make a woman happy. But I have more waiting to do. And more searching. Then, maybe one day, I’ll find the hidden treasure of a one in a million man … But, it’s gonna take some time.

 

In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith

What Love is This

Feelings fast, not true

Flutter past in fleeting dream

What love is this

In current strong

My thoughts are drowned

In quizzical throng

Both doubts and daydreams

Clutter view

Make my logic seem untrue

To remain faithful yet

Within my heart or in my head?

These clash in battle

But alas, in this, one must win

And today a gruesome battle won

My heart the standing champion

But what of my cautious mind?

No, they cannot disagree

These powers must align in unity

To prove my feelings

Not fast, but true

My mind must also steadfast be

To the ever pestering test

What love is this?

The most precious best

 

In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith

Present Blindness

The Lord, He knows

But I do not

I’m fraught with ignorance

Perhaps this present blindness,

though,

Is His blessing in disguise

He’s using it to teach me

Using it to guide me

That I might trust Him

More and more

As passes day by day

I’m once again

Told by Him to wait

The Tongue

Oh words, you flow too fast

Spilling from my lips like foam

 

Oh mouth, you are unguarded

Why do you hang agap

 

Oh mind, you know not what was said

How easily your thoughts have run astray

 

Oh heart, your hurt is too readily shared

Too open, on display for all to see

 

Do you not realize that what you speak

Has such strong effect

On the souls of those you meet

 

Are you so oblivious to believe

When your thoughts are free spoken

They won’t haunt you and you won’t flee

 

When silence comes

Your lips are still

You wait impatiently

Your heart beats continual unrest

You feel anxiety rise within your chest

For your gossip has betrayed a friend

And in the quiet lull that replaces company

Your stomach turns nervously

And you wished what had been said

Hadn’t been

 

A lesson to be learned

From the beast the Word of God has warned

To be the fire breathing dragon

Make Me a Child

I want to be a child, Lord

An infant dependent on Your hand

I want to be vulnerable

Led by You as a shepherd leads his lamb

 

I want to hold on to You

With a childish simplicity

Only ever caring

As to where You are guiding me

 

I want to cry to You, Lord

To be lifted in Love’s embrace

And when I worry

To be covered with the blanket of Your grace

 

I want to look to You, Lord

When my soul begins to hunger

Then, I shall be satisfied

Fed by Your word of power

 

Oh, Lord, make me a child

So I rest in You alone

Make me a child

So You alone I own

 

 

In Christ Alone~EleyanaFaith